Breakthrough by Dr. Lea...How to make 1 toilet paper roll last a year!

Another breakthrough with the Dr.'s team of Dr. Lea, Dr. Albert, and our newest Dr., that would be, Dr. JoJo. 

Well, the group attacked the problem of reusing toilet paper. As awful as that sounds, given the Coronavirus outbreak and the run on toilet paper the leading Dr.s here in North Shore CA started looking for a way to change this situation into a positive. 

As you can see this picture is of a soiled toilet paper experience. Thank God you can't smell it... and please doctors don't invent smellovision!

Soiled TP

The next thing you do is to add Peters Bread Yeast to the soiled area and make sure you cover the entire soiled area...  

Add Peters bread yeast to the soiled part

You can find "Peters bread yeast" in most grocery stores or the Dr.'s can sell you some of theirs. Other bread yeast should work equally as well. Here is a closeup of the yeast...

Closeup of yeast

Next you place it into a standard home microwave, usually 650 watts will do just fine, or a hair dryer will work on high. Put the sample in for 5 minutes on high power setting. The soiled area will be GONE!

As seen in the picture below... Now you are in business with cleaning your used toilet paper up for another time of use. Also, after 20 times of doing this you might want to just clean and then load the samples into the washer machine for a short cycle and into the dryer! 

Clean TP!

From our Dr's to all your family, we hope this helps make your toilet paper go farther even in this trying time of sheltering in place. 

This isn't sheltering at home!

By the way that means at shelter at “home”, if you didn't know. We found some people sheltering out on the sidewalks thinking they didn't make it home in time for the shelter in place order.  

This isn't what the government meant! Take care and the next blog post will be out soon... all about helping you and your family!

Dr. Lea
Dr. Albert
Dr. Jojo

Make your Toilet Paper go farther than you thought! Grow it in your Hydroponics system!

Dr. Lea

Dr. Albert

Used toilet roll.

First off, Dr. Albert and Dr. Lea have found out how to grow your own toilet paper! 

Hidden on each and every roll is a "paper seed"! You can start with a toilet paper roll that is almost completely used as shown on the right. We are all familiar with this but did you know there is a toilet paper "seed" in every roll? Well take a look at where you will find it: 

Locate the end of the roll.

 Find the end of the roll like shown above and then peel the top corner to locate the seed as shown.

The next thing you do is to wrap this seed in a small amount of toilet paper and put into your hydroponics system as shown.. Make sure to have the "seed" in the middle of a small amount of toilet paper and stuff it into the paper roll. 

Place paper into the roll with the toilet paper seed in the middle..

Put roll into your hydroponics

Once you have the roll with the seed into your hydroponics it takes about 1 week to grow a whole new roll. As it grows just move the top of the paper to start to wrap around the tube on the outside and add a rubber band to keep the roll together. 

Each day take the rubber band off and pull more of the new toilet paper from the inside and move it around the outside of the roll until you have the size of the roll you want!

The first case of the coronavirus infection by the internet!

Great news! Dr's Lea and Albert have located the first ever incident of the coronavirus being transmitted over the internet! Yep, hard to believe but this is what they found:

Dr. Lea

Dr. Albert

They have been monitoring all the internet traffic that concerns the coronavirus and what they found was that the internet attack was on the 3D printer networks. Here is how it works... The virus attaches itself to most of the 3D model files. Here is the exact virus and how it looks:

And this is 3D printed inside whatever 3D files one downloads. This can be one of thousands of 3D files available from the Internet. 

Others have confused the coronavirus with the Mexican beer corona which is completely safe to drink and contains no virus at all. So, not to fear... we did test this out locally and as to date no coronavirus symptoms at all have appeared but only hangovers like one might expect.

Below is a map of the 3D printed coronavirus outbreaks. 

Again, back to how it works... is that the coronavirus is attached to the printing of a 3D model. Once the model is done printing, the virus sits there for 24 hours then "spews" out into the air surrounding the physical 3D model and thus infecting its owner.  

And just recently Dr. Lea has been looking into those who were infected by the virus but had not been in contact with anyone who has been in the infected area. What he found was that fruit (yes physical fruit) that is placed near your router can be infected via the Internet! So, make sure not to have any fruit near your main router!

Fruit infected by the coronavirus via your home/business router.

It would also seem that the more acidic the fruit is, makes it more prime for the coronavirus infection. F

or any questions please feel free to contact us on this blog site!

Amazon opts out of deal in NYC! Going to the dark side of the moon!

 

"From the moon with love" 

 Bezos does it again!

This has been so hush hush but the tech staff at laugh trek got the scoop from the famous Doctors Lea and Doctors Albert from the Salton Sea Desert.

Famous Salton Sea Scientist "Dr. Lea"

Famous Salton Sea Scientist "Dr Albert"

Learning of the collapse of Jeff Bezos’s NYC deal that fell through today we knew they had a futuristic backup plan and we got the scoop from the two very famous Doctors at the Salton Sea… here it is…

OK we though the blueorigin space ship system was to take tourists into low earth orbit and back. Well, that is still very true; however, we learned of the “bluemoon” space system. Here is what Bezos’s is planning.

Future "bluemoon" base

He intends to have a big, permanent moon base on the dark side of the moon! He will launch space capsules full of goods and warehouse them on the moon for later return delivery right to your house… directly from the moon. How?

"bluemoon" space capsule launching rail gun!

Well, he will have a fleet of “bluemoon” transports ships, just like freight trains of today moving from the earth orbit and then orbit the moon. We learned he will use a “railgun” approach to fire the capsules into low earth orbit and rendezvous with the “bluemoon” rocket ship. Once secured and ready to go, the rocket with then leave earth's orbit and head to the moon. There are planned at least 3000 transport ships functioning all the time!

Once there the supply capsule will land at the large space port located on the dark side of the moon. It will then be taken into the warehouse system, which they have been running on earth very efficiently.

"bluemoon warehouse robots"

The delivery capsules back to earth will be, again rail gunned back into orbit around the moon and rendezvous with the delivery rocket and back to earth… here is another cool technology they will us… your delivery of your package will be by a re-entry drone that will fly directly to your house! From the moon with love…they call it or rather is their new tagline.

Now why the dark side of the moon? Well, there is no taxes and the land is free for the claiming. The moon base workers will never have to have any light as they are going to use a light pipe system to import the light from the “light side” of the moon. As we saw recently the Chinese landed on the dark side and that was in collaboration with the scientists at the Salton Sea (Dr’s Albert and Lea). 

Light Pipe Technology

They have also worked out all the moon base housing and ways of doing, dig this, not only hydroponics on the dark side but also rising pigs and cows. 

The “horrible greenhouse gases” won’t destroy the little atmosphere of the moon as they will be captured and converted for heating the “moon farm”.

The permanent workers will be wearing space suits modified from

the looks of darth Vader helmets and suit. We all know that Syfy generates the concepts and scientist make them many years later. The workers will have fabulous living arrangements and eat for free! All perks of the “from the moon with love” concept.

For more information contact us using our blog here.

Dr. Lea does it again!!! Saves relationships between men and women!

Dr. Tommy Lea

At an early morning meeting with the press Dr. Lea and Dr. Albert have come up with a great invention to save marriages and relationships all around. What they invented has a cross with...

Cocoa

And...

couple this with his current research on marriage...

Where he identified the exact problem with relationships.... not enough oral sex was quickly identified as the main thing that hinders a close relationship.

So, he and Dr. Albert worked diligently to combine a pill that makes a mans semen taste like chocolate!

Yes... that's right, and after months of live testing in the Coachella valley and the recent approval from the FDA, they are now in negotiations with leading pharmaceutical companies.

When asked which companies they are talking too, Dr. Lea said "I really can't say as it would or might look like insider trading and when your mouth is full of chocolate pills, it's difficult to construct a single intelligible sentence.

One of the surprising things that spurted out of the live testing was that men became multi-orgasmic and the women have become "driven and wildly aggressive in this sex act"! So much so that have become over sensitized and the women are now needed more than one partner due to the addictive nature of the genetically re-engineered chocolate taste Dr. Lea has invented.

We are finding that home live is no longer an issue of fighting about sex but rather the husband is completely satisfied and the man really doesn't give a shit if she has oral sex with others. Quoted that "it might make a the big game parties rather interesting for sure"...

Men used to fear that time of the month from their women.... but not now. With  that time of the month, women are super charged for the taste of chocolate and that is where Dr. Lea says his invention has "hit the sweet spot for everyone".  

What will he call his invention? We asked him that question tongue and cheek, Dr. Lea said "We have given that lots of thought and when you match the palette with the correct experience we think you have a winner... We are going to call it "Cocoa-Jack"... where men dream for the next period.

Cocoa-Jack comes in three flavors...

Double Dark Chocolate- for the ravenous appetite

Dark... Dark Chocolate

Semi- Dark- With a hint of Salton Sea Salt with a spot of heat

White Chocolate- When you need a shot of energy to make it through the day.

White Chocolate

Still working on the Mocha and the Asian Fusion Flavors.

Mocha Flavor

Asian Fusion

Easily dissolvable in liquor so as to make any bar night a fun night.

Cocoa semen shots.... at the bar!

In Africa where they have a population issue, Dr. Lea explains that this might just be the thing they were looking for. As a matter of fact Dr. Lea is scheduled to fly and talk to the United Nations next week on this topic!

Dosage: one pill a day will take care of all your woman's taste needs for chocolate! Don't overdose or it might reverse and taste like bitter chalk. Which will definitely leave a bad taste in her mouth.... and no guy wants that... will lead back to "spitting" Dr. Lea says.


Coming to soon to a pharmacy and bar near you!





For any press release details please contact Peter Brusso.

Dr's Lea and Albert genetically engineer a Crook trapping plant!

North Shore California, near Mecca Ca... history has been made!

The famous Doctor Lea and Doctor Albert have had enough of the crooks, armed robberies, stolen vehicles and such. They put their minds at work and went into the laboratory! They studied the criminal minds and more importantly the olfactory lobes (smell) of the criminal mind.

 

We had two horrible things happen our here with these two individuals which started doctors Lea and doctors Albert thinking about how to stop this...

Link here for the story

 

What they came up with was stunning and a bit of a revolutionary in the crime hunting world.

 

They figured out “HOW” criminals decided to do their next criminal deed. Dr. Lea explains, “It’s really quiet simple, really… criminals smell money first and the need for it second… then they go figure out where the smell is coming from…. and as they say the rest is history.”

It seems to fit; as criminals have this overwhelming smell of money and they need to go get some. That is the first step in this crime solving problem… Dr. Lea explained

After about a week both Doctor Lea and Doctor Albert working on this.. they hit on how to lower the crime rate in any neighborhood. What they did was nothing short of genius but we wouldn’t expect less from these two doctors! Here is the story:

First they got their hands on a Amorphophallus titanum which is that large tropical flower that reaches almost 10 foot tall. Well it’s a plant but you know what I mean. So they took samples into

Standard Titanum from which they started their gene research.

 

 

The first gene manipulated Titanum

their botanical lab, with a gene sequencer they decoded the genes. Then they went to work on changing this plant; as it only blooms one day a year and stinks like a rotting corpse (that just won't work Dr. Albert said). They both knew that that wouldn't attract a crook, robber or thief!

So first they sent out to make it bloom every day! They got very close as that their genetic hybrid blooms 360 days a year…. Close for sure.

Next the smell. They did some Flame Gas chromatography to determine the “smell of money”. Once they understood the molecular makeup of the smell of money, back to the genes!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Doctor Lea and Doctor Albert's Botanical lab...
If you look closely you can see Dr. Albert in the
back left of the lab!

Next they did their gene splicing and direct replacement on the gene to produce the next  hybrid which blooms 360 days of the year and smells like money!

Now be it will only work for American currency but it’s a start.  So to recap they now have a 10 foot bloom that smells like money! This will certainly attract the kind of criminals they want to take off the streets!

 

Next, to gene splice and understand the Venus fly trap!

 

Once done, simple enough Dr. Albert explains “Getting into the “nickers” of Venus fly trap should be easy but you have to remember they EAT MEAT! And we are meat to them… so caution if you should try this at home” he warns.

Once that was done… supersize is necessary.

The "Sugars Crook" plant which traps crooks via the smell of money!

Doctor Lea explains that you have to remember that the scientific method is one step and a time, then look at your results.

We supersized our first Venus fly trap and we had one problem… it almost eat my little dog “sugar” as show here in the picture but in reality it showed us what we needed to see… that it might trap a human too!

"It almost eat my little dog Sugar!" Dr. Lea explains!

 

Sugar wasn’t harmed in any way we want to assure you but it did take us about 10 minutes to free her up without damage to the plant or Sugar. You also have to remember that Venus fly trap takes a week to digest it’s catch so Sugar was in little risk of anything…

She is doing fine now. So much so here is a picture of her in the flowers outside of Dr. Lea’s house.

Little Sugar playing in the flowers after her experience in with her name sake!

 

Next was to graft the large Venus fly trap arms onto the Titanum which went superbly.  

We grew more than one of these bad boys which we call “Sugars crooks” and out across the neighborhood they went.

It was spectacular because these we caught 15 criminals in the first night. We did so well that the North Shore Sheriff Dept had their own paddy wagon out here just collecting criminals!

North Shore Sheriff Paddy Wagon for Dr. Lea's "Catch a crook night"!

 

Now, this worked so well the Sheriff department wants to put these on some type of mobile platform, which Doctor Lea has been hired to design, and move it around southern California.

We even had a visit from the “crimes unit of the FBI” last week… looking at what we are doing.

The justice department is even looking at it and Doctor Albert made sure to point out the “multicolor” nature of the hybrid plant. And, also noted that it contains both male and female parts so not war on sex here or race for that matter.

We are bit concerned that if the plant “Sugars Crook” becomes gender confused it might eat itself; which doctor Lea said we shouldn’t let people under 18 years old watch such a spectacle.  

It might “bend” them for life so we are now developing a visual shield that could be put over a “Sugars Crook” gone wildly wrong just like kids on spring break!

 

Dr. Lea resting after his great crime breaking adventure with his little dog Sugar. If you look closely in the background you can see the paddy wagon still on site.

 

Dr. Albert relaxing after the "Sugars Crook" work where he lead at least 15 Ph.D's in the ground breaking genome research!

 

 

For any media info please contact Dr. Peter Brusso, yes that guy from the Men Who Stare at Goats movie and recently on the American Heros Channel, show Codes and Conspiracies "Experimental Soldiers" (http://www.pdws.biz) at peter@pdws.biz.